Thursday, March 21, 2013

The dilemma: Can you?

Finally, today I have the time to pen down anything except B-school essays. We have all heard the saying, "forgive and forget", which is easier said than done. While I am a staunch follower of this adage, there are many who aren't. And is it really worthwhile to be it's adherent? If yes, can our society survive? Let's look at it from all perspectives.

Let's commemorate our childhood days with the circadian "katti" and "abba". No matter how angry we get at the first instance, we were eager to vindicate the culprit, who once broke your pencil, stole your eraser, or even laughed at you. As we got mature (or let's say immature), we could define "revenge" and "avenge", not only in our english exams but also real life. Violent activities become an everyday occurrence in classrooms.Imitation of your favorite wrestling superstar, your favorite movie star etc, becomes our passion, the raison d'etre.

However, this is one side of the coin. There are many who are born in poor families, where fight for food continues from dusk till dawn. Anti-social activities emerge as side effects in the struggle to be the part of the society. Can you forgive someone who stole your food while you're starving? Yes, idealistically feasible, pragmatically impossible!

In the journey towards maturity, we encounter people, who are dissimilar. Their opinions, values, beliefs, experiences and circumstances form a unique set. And so we indulge in quarrels, which is nothing but "difference of opinions". "Right" and "Wrong" become too subjective concepts to deal with, with a wide chasm, the grey area. But now unlike childhood, redressal can tend to infinity. (We are mature people now)

And finally, there is the side of  corrupt people, criminals and terrorists.Can you forgive someone who took thousands of innocent lives? Or someone who acquired thousands of dollars by unjust means? Or someone who is a rapist?Aren't they still a product of their circumstances? Don't they deserve a second chance or do they??

In this war between should and should not, we forget that life is too small for us to hold grudges. Nobody would want to leave this world with regrets, the "what ifs". Not forgiving someone implies carrying that "extra baggage", which in due course of time will daunt you. Sometimes, all we require is to be a child again.

However, the people who break law must be punished, for it is a deterrent. But it still is a short-term deterrent. We need to get these people rise above their circumstances, by building their value systems, and aiding them to have a life that frees them from the vicious struggle for survival. This might seem unrealistic in the present context, but each of us can contribute in a small way in making growth inclusive and not individualistic.

We have the chisel, to shape our life and the life of others. The next time, someone says, "you're wrong", just remember that there is no absolute right. The beauty of life is in the challenges it poses. What if we are different!! We are unique :)

PS: "When winds blow, some make walls and others wind mills"


    

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